Unself.

will you help me gather my thoughts?

i'm very skillful at covering my truest self, my truest feelings

facade, hide, masquerade

i could be hitting rock bottom for the umpteenth time

and on the same day look like this and put on a smile

can you be me for a moment

live inside me

see the world the way it always looks to me

why do i think when i can when i really don't

and why do i think i can't when i really do

you can wash away the dirt
but you can't wash away the failure

i crave normalcy

and at the same time i don't

but being normal would be so much easy

but at the same time i know that it's ok to not be ok

maybe i'm too hard on myself

still, i'm so tired of being tired

something has got to change

words by me and my boi steven